Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
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