Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
