i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
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