he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
