Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize