Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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