i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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