I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
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