Its about making memories worth repressing
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
