Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
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