at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
why didn't you poke me back
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
This is classic penis vs brain.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize