ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize
