do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
