Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
