Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
