I want to walk on stilts...naked
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I looked at my own cervix.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize