If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
that's an acceptable place to lick
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
