i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
