last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
