I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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