fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Randomize
