that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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