For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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