What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
