i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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