To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Randomize
