oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize