Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
