Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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