I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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