How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Let's get the cat blown out
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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