She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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