im six kinds of drunk right now
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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