She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize