May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
