i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
We need to rekindle our bromance
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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