Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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