Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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