so explain again why im purple
no
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
That's how pantless uber rides happen
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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