The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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