ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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