a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
