I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
