Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize
