Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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