I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
