I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
