You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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