i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
