do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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