if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Just took my morning after pill in the library
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
